Actual ads that Should Have Been Proofread
- For sale: a quilted high chair that can be made into a table, potty chair, rocking horse, refrigerator, spring coat, size 8 and fur collar.
- Dinner Specials: Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00.
- Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.
- We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand.
- For Rent: 6-room hated apartment.
- Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you’ll never go anywhere again.
- Get rid of aunts: Zap does the job in 24 hours.
- Stock up and save. Limit: one.
- Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated? Come here first!
How many FEMA bureaucrats does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two. One to assure the public that everything possible is being done and the other to screw the bulb into the bathroom faucet.
I couldn’t wait for success…so I went ahead without it. ~ Jonathan Winters
Since I seem to have mentioned pets a few times in this issue, I thought I’d close with a pet item. Want a trouble-free pet? Count on the Japanese to build it. Ugobe’s Pleo is undeniably cute, modeled after a baby Camarasaurus, a type of long-necked, plant-eating Jurassic reptile. The Pleo is programmed to respond like a pet. It comes when called, purrs when stroked, and whimpers when hurt. It can be trained to respond to commands. It communicates with other Pleos via infrared technology. The company says it can even catch a cold.
Q: What is the difference between a cat and a comma?
A: A cat has claws at the end of its paws. A comma’s a pause at the end of a clause.